Dedicated to all things X-Tina.

Things seem to be getting back to normal at the Sacramento Empire, so it seems I’ll be able to devote quite a bit more time to you, my fellow readers. This is a good thing™.
Today’s second post is going to deal with homosexuality (as if I hadn’t talked about it enough), so if you are still in the closet, STAY in the closet, get some lube, toilet tissue, and enjoy!
First of all, a question. Is Casey gay? I suppose Casey married G because
He wanted to believe.

He wanted to believe.

And that’s a big part of Casey’s problems. He’ll believe in anything, as long as it’s completely impossible, utterly fantastic, or simply an excercise in futile stupidity. 

So now that you know a little bit of this story’s background, Casey’s mommy, daddy, and friends: I’m going to tell you a secret Casey doesn’t want you to know (oh, the irony). 

WTF is wrong with this picture?

WTF is wrong with this picture?

This pic was sent to you by an anonymous haterz™. It depicts Casey with several messages on his body, a paw drawn around his left nipple, and an arrow pointing straight towards his 

A cock!

A cock!

 Please take notice of Casey’s hair in those pictures.

These are the replies that were received: 

Even a broken clock...

Even a broken clock... right twice a day. right twice a day.

Casey tried to do some damage control by posting something about a “fitness counselor”.  Don’t let him fool you.

No mom! No dad! I swear I didn't invent Christopher Beaver! I don't even know what a Beaver is!

No mom! No dad! I swear I didn't invent Christopher Beaver! I don't even know what a Beaver is!

 And he provided proof… the funniest, strangest, gheyest proof he could think about. But don’t let him fool you. Check out his hair – the first pic didn’t come from this set. It was taken at a different time.

So, no. Casey doesn’t have a “personal trainer” from Memphis.  Casey Serin needs help – there’s nothing wrong with being gay, mind you. It’s the fact that he’s willing to abandon any shred of dignity he has left in pursuit of the shiny. 

Oh, and by the way. I’d like to warn all Sacramento residents. Casey is looking to “couchsurf” – he wants to infect your sofa with fleas, grease and farts. Let’s see what Casey thinks is a proper way to treat a host: 

...and best of all, it's FREE!

...and best of all, it's FREE!

Now, I need to explain why you need to be worried in case you live in Sacramento and have a spare couch. Apparently, Casey is leaving home (again) on June 1st. He has no money, no job, no clothes, no means of transportation, and no remorse.

This is what Casey thinks "CouchSurfing" is all about.

This is what Casey thinks "CouchSurfing" is all about.

This is the interesting thing. Casey has nothing to offer – not a home, an apartment, or even a couch. Yet he thinks he can live “for free”, jumping from couch to couch – basically living off the kindness of strangers. 

Hey Casey. Did you ever stop to think that the people you’ll be mooching off have actually worked their butts for years in order to acquire the home you’ll be staying at, and the couch you’ll be sleeping in? Why do you think you are entitled to live off the hard work of others without giving something in return? You ain’t so special, Snowflake. Nobody is. 

I hope people who “might” want to offer you their couch will read this first.


Comments on: "No, daddy! I swear – I’m not gay!!!! (or “Denial is not a river in Sacramento”)" (18)

  1. Actually, I find Casey realy sexy in those pictures. Having a guy like that on my couch would certainly be worth the farts and a few stains to my couch. If I were not 39 or if I were more youthful-looking for my age, I would be happy to grab a guy like that. Seriously! That being said, Casey still has all my friendship and respect.

  2. Homosexual Con Artist said:

    You would find Casey sexy, Tavington.

    Anyway, James — I don’t have access to CHC, so maybe you can enlighten us — there’s a thread titled “OMG – Nude Casey Pics Leaked (NSFW, NSFAnything)”.

    I’m really hoping that’s a troll or a Photoshop, but nothing would surprise me with this flamer. What’s the straight dope?

  3. I’m not Tavington. I’m Monica from Montreal. That being said, if these pictures were for someone who, in Casey’s opinion at the time, was a potential girlfriend, I think it’s wrong to post them here for everybody to see. They are not obscene per se but they are too sexy and, despite my firm resolution not to have the attitude of a cougar, and not even one who’s beautiful for her age, I couldn’t help getting horny when I saw that set of pictures. That’s just not right. You shouldn’t post pictures that sexy and meant to be so but not meant for the general public. If he actually showed the body parts that were covered by that skimpy clothing, would you have posted the pictures anyway? If Casey was stupid to post such pictures on his publicly available blogs, that would be different since it would have been his choice to show everybody the pictures. By the way, are those pants the gold lamé pants he supposedly wore sometimes but that I have not actually seen?

    • Right… “Monica” hasn’t been heard from in months, then Tavington shows up on Camp Idiot, and Monica reappears right within the hour of Tavington making posts there. Both from Canadian IPs.

      Tav, you were already outed as a fake “Mocha” a while back. Give it up already.

      • Aren’t you even able to see my IP address and notice that it’s from Montreal? “Murses” had actually discovered my last name, my home address and my work address and posted them on one of Casey’s now defunct blogs.

      • Hello, Monica.

  4. No one cares, Tav.

    • I’m not Tav. Casey knows who I am. Why don’t you ask Casey? Actually, why don’t I just tell you? My real name is Monica Vartolomei. I’m Romanian.

      • My real name is Monica Vartolomei. I’m Romanian.

        A thieving gypsy like Casey, eh? There’s a shocker.

  5. Take the thieving gypsy comment back, please!

  6. No name calling, please. You see us as thieves, maybe we see you as greedy capitalistic pigs and I didn’t say so. It’s about cultural differences, that’s all. As for being Gypsies, Gypsies are dark-skinned and came from India. Casey is light-skinned and so am I. Eastern Europeans are white, even more so, at least genetically, than those Whites who may have some black or Native American ancestors. At least know your insults!

  7. While we’re playing Spot The Difference, what happened to the bracelet and where was the tripod the first time?

    It’s just so hilarious that he’d humiliate himself further by posting those photos on facebook just to try and convince his family the Holly one isn’t real.

    Casey, you can lie to people all you want. But realise this: just because they don’t come out and tell you they don’t believe you, doesn’t mean they believe you. They know you’re lying, they just don’t want to hear any more of your bullshit.

  8. Christopher Beaver said:

    No matter what anyone says, Casey did not “invent” me. My name is Chris Beaver, I’m a fitness trainer in Memphis, TN, certified through the National Exercise & Sports Trainers Association. I met Casey online while taking a Real Estate class a few yeas ago. I am working with Casey through an online fitness program and I support him 100% in obtaining his health/fitness goals.

    • True. As incredible as it may seem, you do exist. I stand corrected.

    • But he suddenly remembered you when he needed an excuse to cover up an embarrassing picture which appeared on the internet.
      How much do you usually charge for your “online fitness program”?
      Oh, and as this is Casey we are talking about, he’ll have forgotten about his health/fitness goals within about 6 weeks and moved on to something else.

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